Confession: I've been taking a break! I am really enjoying every last moment of this season. My Christmas tree is holding onto its last bits of chlorophyll, a leaning tower of empty boxes is half-hazardly placed on our dining room table, and my IPod just MIGHT still be still be set to my holiday playlist.
The point is, I've been digging this week (particularly the post-25th rest and relaxation). I should say, however, that I have still been meditating, playing in the present moment, and doing the work. And guess what? It's still working.
It's starting to make me think that maybe it doesn't take 80 days, 40 days, a month, a week, or even a day to shift perspective. I'm starting to realize that shifts can happen in any moment.
Friday, December 28, 2012
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Day 27-28: Wow
I'm not going to say that the last 28 days have been perfect. My boyfriend and I had a quasi-almost-fight on Sunday. I was in an admittedly bad mood.
However, despite recent events in our world, the milli-fight, my second holiday job working retail (you heard it), and a classroom full of 11 year olds that are bursting at the seams with Christmas imaginings, life has become infinitely lighter and lovelier.
However, despite recent events in our world, the milli-fight, my second holiday job working retail (you heard it), and a classroom full of 11 year olds that are bursting at the seams with Christmas imaginings, life has become infinitely lighter and lovelier.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Days 22-26: More Love
Days 22-26: More Love
It was hard to even think about writing in light of what happened at Sandy Hook Elementary on Friday.
I couldn’t make sense of it and I STILL CAN”T. However, in the quiet spaces of my racing mind, the thought “more love” persisted to show itself.
How will the community of Sandy Hook will be healed and cared for in the long run? More love.
How can we help the mentally disturbed and their families? More love.
How can we comfort our children in light of such events? More love.
Like many others, I pondered gun control, school safety, and mental health practices. But, as the days progressed and more news unfolded, the potency of love prevailed.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Day 21: Cha-Ching!
Day 21. 12/12/12. I'm not even going to start with the numerology/symbolism of all this. Let's just call it PERFECT! Wishing all good things for you on this quirky quasi-not even really-holiday.
Monday, December 10, 2012
Day 17-20: Testing 1, 2, Infinity
Day 17,18, 19, 20: Testing 123
Day 17-20: Testing 1, 2, Infinity
Do you believe that we get tested in the spiritual sense?
As you may have read, on Day 16, I was feeling pretty good. Around the Soul in 80 Days had proven to get my positive juices flowing and I was getting ready to sign up to be a juice donor. Then, over the weekend, things started to come up for me. I stumbled upon some unhappy memories and started to question the trajectory of my whole life (I do that sometimes ;).
I started to wonder, is God, that naughty professor, testing me?
Often times, we think we have to pass these spiritual pop quizzes to prove ourselves worthy to God. But being a teacher myself, I started to realize that it's not the test that we sometimes make it out to be. I, as a teacher, just want to make sure that my students get the lesson. Plus, it's not really for me, it's for them. So there it is. The things that I conceive as "tests" are not to prove something to God but rather an opportunity for God to show me that I can do it! Wow! This might be where that quote, "God never gives you anything that you can't handle*" originates. Either way, it's pretty cool to consider. As Marianne Williamson always says, each and every one of us has a personalized curriculum here on Earth. Sounds like it's time for a study sesh at The Coffee Bean.
*Side note: I just need to share that I've never really loved that quote. It always makes me feel like the more that I can handle, the more I'll have to handle! But, reframing it helps.
Day 17-20: Testing 1, 2, Infinity
Do you believe that we get tested in the spiritual sense?
As you may have read, on Day 16, I was feeling pretty good. Around the Soul in 80 Days had proven to get my positive juices flowing and I was getting ready to sign up to be a juice donor. Then, over the weekend, things started to come up for me. I stumbled upon some unhappy memories and started to question the trajectory of my whole life (I do that sometimes ;).
I started to wonder, is God, that naughty professor, testing me?
Often times, we think we have to pass these spiritual pop quizzes to prove ourselves worthy to God. But being a teacher myself, I started to realize that it's not the test that we sometimes make it out to be. I, as a teacher, just want to make sure that my students get the lesson. Plus, it's not really for me, it's for them. So there it is. The things that I conceive as "tests" are not to prove something to God but rather an opportunity for God to show me that I can do it! Wow! This might be where that quote, "God never gives you anything that you can't handle*" originates. Either way, it's pretty cool to consider. As Marianne Williamson always says, each and every one of us has a personalized curriculum here on Earth. Sounds like it's time for a study sesh at The Coffee Bean.
*Side note: I just need to share that I've never really loved that quote. It always makes me feel like the more that I can handle, the more I'll have to handle! But, reframing it helps.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Day 16: Less than 80
Day 16: Less than 80
I am realizing that the positive effects of this venture are TAKING OVER MY LIFE!!!!!!
I am realizing that the positive effects of this venture are TAKING OVER MY LIFE!!!!!!
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Day 14 & 15: Instructions for the Box
Day 14 & 15: Outta the Box
On my way to school this morning, I continued to listen to Danielle La Porte's Firestarter Sessions. She tells us to get out of the box and step on it. Before she could even finish the sentence, my head was grooving to that melody. See below.
On my way to school this morning, I continued to listen to Danielle La Porte's Firestarter Sessions. She tells us to get out of the box and step on it. Before she could even finish the sentence, my head was grooving to that melody. See below.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Day 13: Philosophizin'
Day 13: Philosophizin'
Today during lunch, I took a walk on the track of our school. The weather was post-rain perfect. Butterflies were were fluttering about as I was jumping into puddles (I wore my golashes today).
As I was kicking water, I noticed the leaves falling from the trees and falling onto the dirt.
It made me think about how the leaves would soon provide nutrients to the ground so that something new could grow. And then it hit me!
What if my thoughts worked like leaves, trees, dirt, etc? See diagram below.
Today during lunch, I took a walk on the track of our school. The weather was post-rain perfect. Butterflies were were fluttering about as I was jumping into puddles (I wore my golashes today).
As I was kicking water, I noticed the leaves falling from the trees and falling onto the dirt.
It made me think about how the leaves would soon provide nutrients to the ground so that something new could grow. And then it hit me!
What if my thoughts worked like leaves, trees, dirt, etc? See diagram below.
Make sense?
Day 11 & 12: Clarification of Desire
Day 11 & 12: Clarification of Desire
I still remember my early desires. I wanted hair like She-Ra, my very own magic lamp, and a new house (aka: the Santa Anita Mall).
Even now, as my awareness of what's important expands, I can write you a list. That list includes but is not limited to glowing skin, divine wisdom, good health and food for all, a property on the Central Coast of California, God's email address, streams of passive income, continued connection with my beloved, educational reform, and a wine faucet.
This weekend, however, I decided to pick something that might trump everything else. Are you ready for this? Ok, here it goes.
I think what I really want is the ability to feel grounded, present, and connected despite any circumstance AND a wine faucet.
How about you?
I still remember my early desires. I wanted hair like She-Ra, my very own magic lamp, and a new house (aka: the Santa Anita Mall).
Even now, as my awareness of what's important expands, I can write you a list. That list includes but is not limited to glowing skin, divine wisdom, good health and food for all, a property on the Central Coast of California, God's email address, streams of passive income, continued connection with my beloved, educational reform, and a wine faucet.
This weekend, however, I decided to pick something that might trump everything else. Are you ready for this? Ok, here it goes.
I think what I really want is the ability to feel grounded, present, and connected despite any circumstance AND a wine faucet.
How about you?
Friday, November 30, 2012
Day 10 & 11: Under Pressure!!!
Day 10 & 11: Under Pressure!!!
Actually, I have felt pretty relaxed despite a crazy few days on my school campus (a baby bear has been coming to visit). Thanks to the real life teddy bear walking around and a more chilled state, I have started to ponder the idea of self induced pressure.
Being a middle school teacher, I'm constantly talking about peer pressure. I work my Sunday school best when I remind students about the dangers of succumbing to negative pressure from friends and aquaintences. "March to the beat of your own drum," I prance from one end of the classroom to the other. "Just say no!" I declare with finger zig zags. And finally, just to give myself a giggle because we all know that this is the best and worst of all peer pressure advice, "If so and so jumped off a cliff, would you?"
But I often notice that when it comes to the slipperiness of self induced pressure the conversation doesn't seem to be as rich. Over the years, I have learned to put a lot of pressure on myself. I even see it in my young students. They want to be perfect even if it means putting themselves under a lot of negative stress. I try to steer them away from the need to be perfect, perform, and get things right all the time and have them focus on the joy of learning and growing. But truth be told, I need to focus on the joy of learning and growing just as much as they do.
Friend and philosopher Dr. Cathy Collautt once told me that pressure closes things off and has a destructive quality. Hence, if you put pressure on a relationship, it will not blossom. If you put pressure on your financial situation, the money will not flow. If you put pressure on yourself to be the perfect friend, mother, wife, boyfriend, etc, you will get in your own way.
Instead, we do the crazy of the craziest. We stop forcing ourselves into being a good and start trusting that we are good.
Bottom line. Pressure is not all that.
(unless we are talking about bleeding or David Bowie and Queen collaborations)
https://vimeo.com/23247568
Actually, I have felt pretty relaxed despite a crazy few days on my school campus (a baby bear has been coming to visit). Thanks to the real life teddy bear walking around and a more chilled state, I have started to ponder the idea of self induced pressure.
Being a middle school teacher, I'm constantly talking about peer pressure. I work my Sunday school best when I remind students about the dangers of succumbing to negative pressure from friends and aquaintences. "March to the beat of your own drum," I prance from one end of the classroom to the other. "Just say no!" I declare with finger zig zags. And finally, just to give myself a giggle because we all know that this is the best and worst of all peer pressure advice, "If so and so jumped off a cliff, would you?"
But I often notice that when it comes to the slipperiness of self induced pressure the conversation doesn't seem to be as rich. Over the years, I have learned to put a lot of pressure on myself. I even see it in my young students. They want to be perfect even if it means putting themselves under a lot of negative stress. I try to steer them away from the need to be perfect, perform, and get things right all the time and have them focus on the joy of learning and growing. But truth be told, I need to focus on the joy of learning and growing just as much as they do.
Friend and philosopher Dr. Cathy Collautt once told me that pressure closes things off and has a destructive quality. Hence, if you put pressure on a relationship, it will not blossom. If you put pressure on your financial situation, the money will not flow. If you put pressure on yourself to be the perfect friend, mother, wife, boyfriend, etc, you will get in your own way.
Instead, we do the crazy of the craziest. We stop forcing ourselves into being a good and start trusting that we are good.
Bottom line. Pressure is not all that.
(unless we are talking about bleeding or David Bowie and Queen collaborations)
https://vimeo.com/23247568
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Day 8: My Super Uncomplicated Meditation Practice
Day 8: My Super Uncomplicated Meditation Practice
I've been back to meditating these days and it feels really good. My meditation practice is so easy, I do it in my sleep (not really on purpose but I can't help it). But hey, drifting back into sleep is hardly a set back especially when you wake up for the nice wrap up, "Go in peace and love" or "Now serve a higher purpose." Just like anything, the meaty stuff is at the end and I feel accomplished even on those days that I zzzz instead of ommmm.
My favorite meditation audios come from Mediation Oasis and Abraham Hicks. This morning, I listened to Meditation Oasis' 15 minute "Flowing Freely" meditation which is on the Ease of Being album. They also have a podcast which is rich in free material. Anyone who is close to me knows that I love love love Abraham Hicks so their meditations are another morning go to (they are also short and sweet).
Writer and sage woman Jean Compton has a free guided meditation on her website http://jeancompton.com/free-guided-meditation/. I listened to her meditation live and I didn't fall asleep but I did drool a little bit. Check her out.
I've been back to meditating these days and it feels really good. My meditation practice is so easy, I do it in my sleep (not really on purpose but I can't help it). But hey, drifting back into sleep is hardly a set back especially when you wake up for the nice wrap up, "Go in peace and love" or "Now serve a higher purpose." Just like anything, the meaty stuff is at the end and I feel accomplished even on those days that I zzzz instead of ommmm.
My favorite meditation audios come from Mediation Oasis and Abraham Hicks. This morning, I listened to Meditation Oasis' 15 minute "Flowing Freely" meditation which is on the Ease of Being album. They also have a podcast which is rich in free material. Anyone who is close to me knows that I love love love Abraham Hicks so their meditations are another morning go to (they are also short and sweet).
Writer and sage woman Jean Compton has a free guided meditation on her website http://jeancompton.com/free-guided-meditation/. I listened to her meditation live and I didn't fall asleep but I did drool a little bit. Check her out.
Monday, November 26, 2012
Day 6 & 7: Sickie and Special Requests
Day 6: Sickie
I'mb sick. Achoo!
I spent the day on the couch, slurping soup, and tackling the mysteries of life today.
While watching Brave I extracted the obvious, "Our fate lives within us, you only have to be brave enough to see it" and "A lady never leaves her weapon on the table." Okay, got it. Watched Quiz Show. Always tell the truth and don't mess with Herbie Stemple. Noted. 75 year old Jean Houston was on Oprah's Super Soul Sunday. She was talking about the hero's journey. This seemed substantial but I didn't get much from it because I was Googling her skin care regimen. From under the covers, I made an impulse buy on Amazon. It was Bill Moyer's interview of Joseph Campbell (sadly not Jean Houston's night cream). While soaking in an epsom salt bath, I listened to the genius Danielle LaPorte's Fire Starter Sessions.
In my vulnerable state, I have to admit that this 80 day project is starting to feel like a project.
Day 7: Special Requests
I said a prayer last night. I asked God for a little more lightness, a little more groovey, and a little less fanatical.
I hear my song playing today.
I'mb sick. Achoo!
I spent the day on the couch, slurping soup, and tackling the mysteries of life today.
While watching Brave I extracted the obvious, "Our fate lives within us, you only have to be brave enough to see it" and "A lady never leaves her weapon on the table." Okay, got it. Watched Quiz Show. Always tell the truth and don't mess with Herbie Stemple. Noted. 75 year old Jean Houston was on Oprah's Super Soul Sunday. She was talking about the hero's journey. This seemed substantial but I didn't get much from it because I was Googling her skin care regimen. From under the covers, I made an impulse buy on Amazon. It was Bill Moyer's interview of Joseph Campbell (sadly not Jean Houston's night cream). While soaking in an epsom salt bath, I listened to the genius Danielle LaPorte's Fire Starter Sessions.
In my vulnerable state, I have to admit that this 80 day project is starting to feel like a project.
Day 7: Special Requests
I said a prayer last night. I asked God for a little more lightness, a little more groovey, and a little less fanatical.
I hear my song playing today.
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Friday, November 23, 2012
Day 3 and 4
Day 3:
Thanksgiving Day.
Day 4: Where the party at?
I have been raised Catholic, have attended Catholic schools all my life, and could probably sing the Beatitudes to the tune of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn." My mother, however, had a very relaxed relationship with God. Every time I raised the question about going to Mass on Sunday, Mom, all bundled up in her PJs and robe, would inform me that God was in our house and Mass was just not party that my teachers were making it out to be. In fact, "God is everywhere," she would say. So, once we were done having breakfast, we could go to the mall and see God, we could go and get sushi and see God, or we could just lay around and hang out with God. God, according to Chris Lluch, was easy peasey. Plus, there was not as much traffic coming from His place to ours.
Thanksgiving Day.
Day 4: Where the party at?
I have been raised Catholic, have attended Catholic schools all my life, and could probably sing the Beatitudes to the tune of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn." My mother, however, had a very relaxed relationship with God. Every time I raised the question about going to Mass on Sunday, Mom, all bundled up in her PJs and robe, would inform me that God was in our house and Mass was just not party that my teachers were making it out to be. In fact, "God is everywhere," she would say. So, once we were done having breakfast, we could go to the mall and see God, we could go and get sushi and see God, or we could just lay around and hang out with God. God, according to Chris Lluch, was easy peasey. Plus, there was not as much traffic coming from His place to ours.
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Day 2. Let's chill.
This blog post is dedicated to all my homies who sometimes, JUST SOMETIMES, find themselves a little bunched up. AKA: Note to self:
I don't know about anybody else, but when I'm told about the power of letting go, I sorta "yeah, yeah, yeah" in my head and secretly want the speaker/adviser/author to get on with it so we can get to THE JUICY "HOW TO" PART! Lettings go seems SO Chapter 1, so unexciting, so passive, so bleh!
And with all due respect all things spiritual, it also seems counter intuitive. I don't want to let go, I want to COLLECT knowledge, chunks of love, heavenly moments, timeless wisdom, eternal joy, and 10 tips for being happier (thank you Gretchen Rubin).
Despite all of this, life experience is constantly showing me that maybe what SEEMS counter intuitive is actually intuition at its best. I can't help but notice how things fall into place when I sit back and let things be. Joy seems to sleep over when I let life present itself. I find myself appreciating the bright orange of cones on the street as if they are a splash of color put there just for us. Even the construction work that would usually elicit a letter writing campaign seems to have a rhythm.
Okay, okay. I know what you might be thinking, "Marissa, really? The orange of the cones?"
To that I'm going to say, "Why not?" It's a sometimes easier to deeply appreciate little things in life (color, nature, a child sprawled in a stroller as if he is rolling with his body guard, your quirky aunt's phone message, the random "like" that you got on Facebook, the rattling of your husband's keys when he comes home, or your little old lady neighbor's pop of lip color... We see you girl!). It is in that context when big things inevitably happen.
"CHILLIN" HOMWORK:
READER'S CHOICE
A) Write down 5 little things added low-profile goodness to your day (Just don't steal the orange cones. Those are mine okaaaaaay?)
or
B) Listen to "Let's Chill" by Guy (It's a GTE = Guaranteed Transcendental Experience)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Wj8Yxa309Edon
This blog post is dedicated to all my homies who sometimes, JUST SOMETIMES, find themselves a little bunched up. AKA: Note to self:
I don't know about anybody else, but when I'm told about the power of letting go, I sorta "yeah, yeah, yeah" in my head and secretly want the speaker/adviser/author to get on with it so we can get to THE JUICY "HOW TO" PART! Lettings go seems SO Chapter 1, so unexciting, so passive, so bleh!
And with all due respect all things spiritual, it also seems counter intuitive. I don't want to let go, I want to COLLECT knowledge, chunks of love, heavenly moments, timeless wisdom, eternal joy, and 10 tips for being happier (thank you Gretchen Rubin).
Despite all of this, life experience is constantly showing me that maybe what SEEMS counter intuitive is actually intuition at its best. I can't help but notice how things fall into place when I sit back and let things be. Joy seems to sleep over when I let life present itself. I find myself appreciating the bright orange of cones on the street as if they are a splash of color put there just for us. Even the construction work that would usually elicit a letter writing campaign seems to have a rhythm.
Okay, okay. I know what you might be thinking, "Marissa, really? The orange of the cones?"
To that I'm going to say, "Why not?" It's a sometimes easier to deeply appreciate little things in life (color, nature, a child sprawled in a stroller as if he is rolling with his body guard, your quirky aunt's phone message, the random "like" that you got on Facebook, the rattling of your husband's keys when he comes home, or your little old lady neighbor's pop of lip color... We see you girl!). It is in that context when big things inevitably happen.
"CHILLIN" HOMWORK:
READER'S CHOICE
A) Write down 5 little things added low-profile goodness to your day (Just don't steal the orange cones. Those are mine okaaaaaay?)
or
B) Listen to "Let's Chill" by Guy (It's a GTE = Guaranteed Transcendental Experience)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Wj8Yxa309Edon
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Day 1
I wanted to see what happened when I let the winds take me. You see, sometimes I feel the need to manipulate my life. In my recent past (4 hours ago), there was some square peg into round holing it around finances. Tactics include but are not limited to beating myself up for not meeting my own expectations (in this case some debt) and my favorite of all time, unleashing thought after thought after thought about the situation that I DON'T want in my life anymore.
Let me tell you, it's exhausting and it usually ends in a prayer that sounds like this, "God, I now give you full permission to have a little angel take a little celestial bat to my head to reset this shit." Now, I have to tell you that despite the use of the SH word, God always answers this prayer which is a very good sign for things to come.
With the compulsive thinking on mute-ish, an idea came to mind. What would happen if I chose the present moment, the happier thought, or taking a breath for the next 80 days? I mean, the control freak inside of me likes the organized, routine, consistent fashion of applying something for 80 days. If this were a diet, fo sho I would fit into my skinnies (or at least seam marks on my inner thighs wouldn't be so deep when I wiggled them off at night)! Plus, with the holidays coming up, this is going to be an awesome opportunity to practice joy! Could I, Marissa Lluch, be the zen mistress of the BIG LOTS line this season? Just maybe.
For the next 80 days, I'm going to choose happiness. I'm going to breathe. I'm going to write emails to myself (which I'll share). I'm going to get cozy with Spirit. I'm going to start cussing in mantras and easing myself to sleep with a little smile on my face.
I don't know where this thing is going to take us but do you want to join me?
Let me tell you, it's exhausting and it usually ends in a prayer that sounds like this, "God, I now give you full permission to have a little angel take a little celestial bat to my head to reset this shit." Now, I have to tell you that despite the use of the SH word, God always answers this prayer which is a very good sign for things to come.
With the compulsive thinking on mute-ish, an idea came to mind. What would happen if I chose the present moment, the happier thought, or taking a breath for the next 80 days? I mean, the control freak inside of me likes the organized, routine, consistent fashion of applying something for 80 days. If this were a diet, fo sho I would fit into my skinnies (or at least seam marks on my inner thighs wouldn't be so deep when I wiggled them off at night)! Plus, with the holidays coming up, this is going to be an awesome opportunity to practice joy! Could I, Marissa Lluch, be the zen mistress of the BIG LOTS line this season? Just maybe.
For the next 80 days, I'm going to choose happiness. I'm going to breathe. I'm going to write emails to myself (which I'll share). I'm going to get cozy with Spirit. I'm going to start cussing in mantras and easing myself to sleep with a little smile on my face.
I don't know where this thing is going to take us but do you want to join me?
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